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Dracula Lives On

By Elissa Bernstein

I want to suck your blood!

More feeling! I vant more feeling,” Alexander, the temperamental Russian director, called out from the back of the university auditorium. “I don’t beleeve a vord ov eet!

Chris, who was playing the vampire, answered back. “It’s Dracula, not Shakespeare.

Alexander waved his fist. “At Moscow Conservatory, actorr hadd respect for dyerector. Ve do finall scene now. Maybe death vill inspire you.

Chris clenched his jaw as he climbed into the coffin and started the scene.

Another actor lunged at him with a knife.

Hey! That things looks dangerous!” Chris screamed from the coffin.

Alexander screamed furiously. “Dat is vhy you havve protecteev vest!

Professor Merkster poked his head in the theatre. He was the faculty advisor for the show. “Hi folks, let me know if you need any help.

More eenterrawptions! I can’t vork like dees.” Alexander pouted.

During the break, Chris complained to his friend who was playing Renfrew, Dracula’s sidekick.

He’s interfering with my interpretation! And these props are ridiculous.

Renfrew bit into a chocolate bar. “Chill, Chris. Alexander’s a genius.

Chris grabbed a piece of the bar. “I’m the one with star quality. I don’t need fancy props or fancy direction.

Opening night soon arrived. Chris was full of adrenaline as he paced backstage waiting for his climactic death scene. He ran up to Renfrew. “I’ve never felt so ‘on’. I AM Dracula, tonight!

You’re an inspiration.” Renfrew munched on some peanuts. “By the way, your left fang is loose.

Chris pushed past him. “I hear my cue. I’m off to add more glory to the art.

The audience watched in rapt attention as Dracula’s nemesis went for the kill. “Your blood-sucking days are over, Count Dracula.” He thrust the knife into Chris.

The audience gasped in delight as the fake blood spurted. Or at least, what they thought was fake blood.

Chris fell onto his fellow actor, whispering into his ear. “The protective vest didn’t work! That’s MY blood!

Forgetting his injury for a moment, Chris finished the scene. “Goodbye cruel world…I did only good things.” Then he collapsed into the coffin.

Chris was rushed to the hospital.

He suffered serious injuries. “I’m suing the school! This is all their fault!


IN THE COURTROOM

In court, Chris was heavily bandaged. “Your Honor, the faculty advisor should have protected me from this dangerous fight scene. University regulations clearly prohibit weapons on campus. The university is liable for their employees’ negligence. Make them pay.

The university balked. “Your Honor, The faculty advisor volunteered his time for the show. That wasn’t part of their regular duties so we can’t be liable.

Is the university liable for Chris’ injuries? You! be the Judge. Then look below for the court’s decision.


THE DECISION

Pay Dracula for his injuries,” Judge Bill ordered the university. “Although Professor Merskster was acting in a nonacademic capacity when he offered to be faculty advisor, he was still responsible for enforcing university rules. The university is liable for his negligence.


This column is based on a case from Texas. If you have a similar problem, please contact a lawyer in your jurisdiction. We are proud to bring you some of the current legal issues from across the country for discussion and debate. To provide compelling entertainment, we have fictionalized the names, the characters and the scenarios in the case. Any resemblance to real people is purely coincidental. In the interest of clarity and brevity, the legal issues in the case have been greatly reduced and simplified. Elissa Bernstein is a lawyer and nationally syndicated columnist. Copyright 2007 Haika Enterprises AS1-1 (AS1-6).


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